While walking to the Pantheon from our Rome VRBO with my two sons, one of them asked, “Hey Mom, name three things that are better in America.”
Hmmm, I was surprised when nothing came to mind. “Definitely not artichokes,” I responded. Roman artichokes are the best thing I’ve ever tasted — garlicky and herby, they melt in your mouth. Definitely not strawberries either — the wild strawberries we bought at the Campo de’ Fiori market tasted like Skittles. The ones I buy here taste like cardboard. Produce in Italy and France is better than ours. Sorry, but it’s true.
Definitely not chocolate. Order hot chocolate over there and it is decadently rich. Carnation and Swiss Miss are water with brown dye and who-knows-what. Gross. And gelato, oh the gelato — banana, pear, lemon, mango, salted caramel and dark chocolate are my favorites. Grocery store ice cream tastes like cold puffed air compared to the richness of gelato. (Gelato tip: For authentic gelato, look for banana. If it is yellow, leave — it’s fake. Banana should be grayish like a mashed ripe banana. This also goes for peach and mango — if it is bright orange, walk away.)
I don’t eat much meat, but the Florentine aged-to-perfection steak beats our flavorless, chewy meat any day of the week. Even the convenience store in Rome had a full-service deli dude custom slicing prosciutto, salami and all the things you charcuterie board people love.
And bread, oh the bread. Flaky light croissants, crusty baguettes and rustic Italian loaves served with the most delicious olive oil. It’s hard to go back to Nature’s Own.
“We scoop and dispose of our dog poop better in America,” I finally responded. Walking five to 10 miles a day in Florence and Rome, we yelled poop alerts a lot. (It’s really bad in Spain too, especially Granada.) And all that dog poop, as well as big city litter and runoff, flows into the Tiber River, making it unsafe for swimming. “And we have environmental regulations attempting to prevent pollution of our waterways so we can swim in them,” I added. Although, two of my kids got impetigo (a severe skin infection) from tubing/wakeboarding in Bayou Texar so maybe that doesn’t count.
Speaking of walking — Paris, Lyon, Florence and Rome are mind-blowingly walkable cities. Wear your walking shoes, even with your fine evening attire. (The locals do!) The only cabs we took were to and from the airport. The public transportation systems are excellent too. My son says the rail system in Amsterdam is the best ever. And there are more bikes than cars.
With only one solid answer which included poop, I posed the question back to my son. His reply was nature — national parks and wide-open spaces. Yes, every proper European city has a fancy park and gardens but in America you can drive for miles and seemingly get nowhere. Good answer, son, now we have two.
Take a guess at what we do WAY better than Europe. Public bathrooms! Theirs can be nasty holes in the ground that may not flush (bring your own TP!) and be prepared to pay a euro for that nastiness. Never underestimate the value of clean, available toilets, my fellow Americans.
So, our intellectual discussion came down to this: Europe has amazing art, architecture, history, museums, fascinating ruins, breathtaking sculptures, delicious food, markets, bread, wine, gelato, vibey piazzas, walking routes, affordable user-friendly public transportation, beautiful bike paths…but it is hard to enjoy all that if you are constantly stepping in poop, looking for a clean bathroom or craving wide-open spaces. It’s the simple things, y’all.
Now don’t get me started on recycling. They win, hands down.
