“Desuetude,” Sandra Gary Winborne, Ph.D., explained in her “Are You Stuck?” vlog, is about things we no longer use, no longer need, yet find so hard to part with.
“It’s an interesting word,” she said. “Many of us have a lot of stuff around that we no longer need, but at the time, when they were invented, everybody needed them.”
From microwaves to DVDs, from typewriters to 8-track tapes, many of us cling to items that are simply outdated. Yet, emotionally, we’re still holding on.
Winborne, affectionately known as Dr. Winnie, holds a doctor of philosophy in adult education and is a prominent speaker, an advisor on emotional well-being and an educational consultant at Winnie & Associates, LLC. Her “Are You Stuck?” vlog, produced three-times weekly, is a platform to empower participants to learn to converse with anyone; child, king or queen. She has approximately 4.3 thousand followers who join at facebook.com/sandragary.winbornephd.
Winborne recently examined how “desuetude” brings clutter into our lives and how to clear the clutter. She shared a poignant story about her own experience of holding onto her late mother’s belongings.
“When my mother passed,” she recalled, “I kept a lot of stuff. And one day I woke up and it was nine and a half years that the stuff was still in storage. That’s when I said, that’s ridiculous.”
She realized that despite paying nearly $10,000 over the years to store these items, they had no real purpose in her life.
Many of us have homes and hearts filled with keepsakes that we’re emotionally tied to, but which serve no purpose in our current lives. Often, these objects become dormant — a physical and emotional weight we drag from year to year.
Winborne pointed out that our attachment to material items also represents the constant evolution of technology and lifestyle. In a world where even CDs are considered vintage, it’s clear that technology is evolving at a pace that makes many possessions short-lived.
“Eventually, we have a house full of unused stuff, she said.
The solution? Recognize that it’s normal for things to become “desuetude” in our lives, to let them go, and to move forward.
Letting go isn’t just about making space; it’s about creating a life where your value is based on experiences, not things. And while it’s tempting to hold onto every memento, freeing yourself from the weight of unused items can lead to a lighter, more fulfilling life.
Winborne shared how she now sends boxes of her mother’s cherished items to family members who would appreciate them, saying, “It makes me happy knowing they’re being enjoyed, rather than gathering dust.”
If you’re struggling to part with things, start small. Take stock of what you have and be honest about what truly adds value to your life. Consider donating items to someone who would enjoy them now or re-gifting heirlooms to family members. And remember, you’re allowed to let go of the past to make room for a present you love.
As Winborne wisely observed, “Everything we have and hold on to will become obsolete, just like we will.”
But rather than clinging to objects that have outlived their purpose, we can choose to live more intentionally and in tune with the world as it is now.
After all, “Stuff is just stuff, but the essence of who we are is who we are,” Winborne reminds us.
So, take a deep breath, let go of what’s holding you back, and embrace the life you want to create.
